matchbox cars...

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that."
James 4:13-16

It's funny how just when you think you have given God your matchbox cars (things that you haven't quite fully surrendered yet) He reminds you that you are still holding onto them a little too tightly.

It seems that the story of my life is people asking me what I am going to do with my life come May. This isn't necessarily a bad question, but I definitely don't know the answer to it. And sometimes in an effort to "protect me" or "look out for me" people try to figure my life out for me. It all results in me being discouraged and feeling like I have to have some definite answer to give people...

Which brings me back to the matchbox cars. Somewhere along the way of people freaking out that I don't know where I am going to be, I have tried to make a plan. And while that plan may change every week, it is still my relentless efforts to somehow decide where I will be when college is no more... all the while God is whispering in my ear that He knows... that my plans will fail, but His will prevail... that in patient waiting, answers will come... and that His vision for me is far greater than anything I could possibly try to "plan."

So here I am... attempting once again to give this matchbox car of "where I will be in May" to God. I haven't a clue where I will end up, but my Creator knows and I am resting in the peace that comes with understanding that. And while God is weaving together a perfect vision for my life, I will continue to chase after His dreams and His purpose for me... holding out my matchbox cars to Him along the way.