when there aren't words...

Life is so full.  Full of beauty and pain and brokenness and joy and heartache and celebration.  Somewhere along the way I stopped posting on here because I honestly felt like I just needed to pause for a moment.  The past few months have been full of beauty, but they have also been full of tragedy.  And tragedy leaves our hearts in a messy place where there are often no words.

So instead of words, it was hours spent on buses and listening to stories of a beautiful life and holding old wrinkled hands when there was nothing left to say.  It was just being there and remembering to treasure every heart and every moment.

{Nicauri and Angelita on Christmas day}

...

Here are some pictures from the past few months...

{Terrill, Rachel, Christine, and I in Haiti}

{Haiti}

{precious sisters}

{Nena and Indiana}

{Nena fixing Christine's hair... siempre}

{comprando.}

{Jochi's high school graduation!}

{special, special day}

{Jochi and Yessica}

{weekend glimpses}

The stark contrasts in my life used to paralyze me.  It didn't make sense to be visiting loved ones in a neighborhood full of complete darkness--their reality--and hours later to be eating at a fun restaurant with my friends.  I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that some of my friends occasionally don't have enough money to eat dinner at night and I have enough for a plane ticket back home.  The differences haunt and confuse me if I let myself linger there and my thoughts never yield anything close to a simple answer.

Last night I went to McDonald's with a friend to get some work done for school.  It is basically the closest thing we have to a coffee shop around here... coffee and free wifi are hard to come by.  And there we found ourselves asking that familiar question once again.  Is it ok?  Is it ok that we are spending money on this meal when we know what else that money can buy?  When the money used on one meal there could feed an entire family for a day?  When we know how that money could benefit those our eyes have seen and our hearts have loved?

There are no easy answers to those questions and I know there never will be.  But I just pray that our hearts don't ever become numb to the Kingdom.  That we don't slowly find we are living for ourselves once again.  That we recognize that we are responsible for our spending and have been entrusted with much.  That instead of attempting to answer all those questions, we are seeking the Father's heart for His people.

{weekend glimpses}

{decorations in my classroom done by my sweet friend}

{leftover cake for breakfast}

{Rachel :: so so thankful for her!}

{REAL mexican food!}

{trigo de oro :: the cutest little bakery in a nearby city}

{cafe con leche.  siempre.}

{spanish clue :: bringing back childhood memories}

{weekend glimpses}

{Baby boo... such a reminder of God's faithfulness and to believe in impossible things}

{jaibon}

{chispita}

{blankito}

{our sweet sister came to visit and brought us a POPCORN MACHINE}

{palomitas}

{aloe :: healing an awful sunburn with the real deal}

...

"The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save.  He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing."

{Zephaniah 3:17}

{weekend glimpses}

This past weekend was full of picking up a dear sister at the airport and thoughts about the preciousness of life and lots of coffee on the balcony.  It was full of a quiet morning with the Lord before anyone awoke and a beautiful picture of redemption at church and a whole lot of papers to grade.  It was full of special gifts that show just how much we are known and loved and an hour long wait for a hamburger with my sweet roommate and going through several boxes of peanut butter sandwich girl scout cookies.  It was full of a simple email of encouraging words that filled my soul and finally drinking greca coffee with one of my favorite Americanas and glimpses of hope as the Lord draws His people to Him.  

{el cafe sabe mejor en tazas lindas}

Sometimes it does this forgetful mind some good to write it all down and remember.  God is so good.

...

"Let us acknowledge the Lord; let us press on to acknowledge Him.  As surely as the sun rises, He will appear; He will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth."

{Hosea 6:3}

{weekend glimpses}

This past weekend was full of surprises and celebrations and things happening that I had only dreamed about.  Saturday was my birthday and some of my dearest friends from the other side of the island showed up Friday night... and I had no idea :)  It was such an incredible weekend, full of laughter and stories and coffee and precious time with some very special people.  Needless to say, my heart was full and I felt so deeply known and loved and grateful. 

{right after Jacqueline and Manano walked in my house}

{worlds colliding}

{birthday flowers}

{brunch}

{surprise #2}

{gracia}

{these two women are incredible and inspire me to live life with my heart wide open}

{bringing some Jaibon to San Pedro}

{the malecon}

{love these two with my whole heart}

{hermanos}

{blessed}

{cena mexicana}

{las quiero muchoooo.}

{weekend glimpses}

{cafe con leche in one of my favorite spots}

{one of my favorite Jaiboneras}

{guandules}

{favorites in esperanza :: so grown up}

{jaibon}

{LOVE his smile}

{birthday cranium in spanish!}